Post Classifieds
Social media migration leaves loved ones unknown
By Colleen Young
On April 24, 2013
I'm afraid of the impact that our new best friends, our cell phones, have on our interactive skills with
each other as a society.
I'm very thankful for all of the advancements we've made with technology and the ease it has given
me to keep in touch with loved ones I don't usually see.
I love that I can keep in touch with the ones I care about at any moment, no matter where I am.
Phones have connected our society more than ever before, but I'm starting to think that they connect
us with the people we aren't with and they take us away from the people who we are with.
We need to put down our phones, connect with the people around us and have real conversations.
I'll admit it - I have far too many important conversations on my cell phone that I should be having in
person.
Without eye contact or seeing people's facial expressions and reactions, a simple phone conversation
can be horribly hurtful or misunderstood.
We can't substitute phone conversations for the in-person interaction that we should be yearning for
each and every day.
"Many are understanding what over-reliance on digital devices and digital media is doing to us," said
Dr. Bill Tollefson, a Life Coach. "It is not socially healthy and has changed our ability to have fulfilling
relationships, personally and socially. Our communication skills, the ones we use human to human, have
deteriorated."
I need to make more of an effort to actually see and catch up with my loved ones in person. I don't want
to just learn how they're doing by creeping on their Facebook.
"(Social networking websites) promised us a technological route to connect with others better and
grow our relationships, when in fact we are only building a relationship with the internet and/or the
device, not another human," Tollefson said.
I'm afraid of losing touch with those I love and actually getting to know the social media version of
them better than I know them in person. I'm afraid of losing the human connection that we experience
without any interruptions; especially cell phones.
Helen Lee Lin of www.scientificamerican.com said that our phones can hurt our close relationships. This
was proven by a set of studies by Andrew K. Przybylski and Netta Weinstein of the University of Essex.
Quite interestingly, they found that "..simply having a phone nearby, without even checking it, can be
detrimental to our attempts at interpersonal connection," Lin said.
I miss the face-to-face conversations that we as fellow humans used to have and the confidence that
people had to say how they truly felt in person.
We shouldn't build and strengthen our relationships with people through our cell phones. We
shouldn't find our comfort zones in these little rectangular technological devices.
"The new research suggests that cell phones may serve as a reminder of the wider network to which
we could connect, inhibiting our ability to connect with the people right next to us," Lin said. Cell
phone usage may even reduce our social consciousness.»
We don't talk to one another in person at school, and I think we should. Instead of saying "Hi" to the
person next to us, we update our "Statuses" or "Tweets" so our friends at other schools can be just as
anti-social as we are and read our latest updates.
"Mobile telephones can be a useful tool, but that is all they are, a tool, if misused, they lead to people
trying to avoid real life, said author Maria C. Collins. "One cannot put a wall of technology between
oneself and the rest of the World, without that insulation causing problems. Social interaction, face to
face, is part of the skills humans need to learn, and have as part of their growth and development."
I think if we out down our cell phones, we may even get to know more about each other.
Imagine how social we'd be if we had the confidence in person to connect with people on campus that
we do on our cell phones. Our everyday lives would be much more personable, interactive and exciting.
Our dependence on technology has de-humanized our relationships with each other. We're more
interested in staying connected in cyber space and maintaining a strong online presence, though we
mustn't let our phones become bigger priorities than the people right in front of us.
We need to get our noses out of our phones, pay attention to the present and try harder to be in
the moment. Let's change the way we interact with those around us so we can strive off of human
connection.
Colleen Young can be reached by email at young.record@live.com.
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